How to Stay Positive After a Break-Up

For whatever reason a break up occurs, one if not both of the individuals involved typically experience heartache. While you may know that the pain is temporary and the world will not come to an end, for the moment, time seems to stand still. Though minutes, hours and days are now wrought with pain, the devastating event can serve as an experience for personal growth.

Be Grateful

Now is the time to start changing your mindset. Before getting out of bed in the morning, think about at least 10 people, places or things for which you are truly grateful. This simple exercise helps establish the mood for the day by getting your mind to focus on something other than your current prison of pain. Initially, you might only be able to express gratitude for the fact that you woke up breathing. However, in time, the list grows and becomes more heartfelt. You might also extend the exercise to consider the things that went right during the day before going to sleep at night.

Change Routines

If Friday nights were previously spent watching movies together, contact one or more friends and go for a bike ride or a jog. Go to different stores, find new driving routes. Make as many changes as possible to help you create new memories. New faces and places help rewire the brain and alter neural pathways. The new pathways then provide the chance to release neurotransmitters that allow you to feel peace and joy.

End the Procrastination

With more time on your hands, you can now accomplish the many tasks that have been sitting on the back burner. Make those repairs, organize those areas, redecorate you bedroom. Perhaps there are goals that you set for yourself awhile back that lost importance. Think about the hobbies you wanted to try or the skills that you desired to learn. Now is the time to reconsider and put forth some serious energy toward achievement.

Get a Makeover

Change the length of your hair, indulge in a new color. Survey your wardrobe and consider adding some new items. Resist the fear to reinvent yourself and create a new and improved you. Maybe that old relationship restricted you from dressing a certain way, wearing your hair in a particular style or growing facial hair. Those restrictions no longer exist and you can now reveal the real you.

Media Makeover

No doubt there were songs, movies or other forms of media entertainment that the two of you shared. Especially if these now bring pain to the surface, clean your media storage. Do not fall into the trap of punishing yourself by listening to break-up songs or watching movies that require a box of tissues. Find options that offer emotional, psychological and physical motivation. Explore new options and make a fresh start that reflects the new you.

 

Cite this page: N., Pam M.S., "How to Stay Positive After a Break-Up," in PsychologyDictionary.org, February 21, 2016, https://psychologydictionary.org/article/how-to-stay-positive-after-a-break-up/ (accessed March 23, 2019).
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