Wives sometimes get a gut feeling that a husband is involved in some type of activity that jeopardizes their relationship and marriage. Despite intuitive thoughts and feelings, odds are he is not going to confess willingly. However, FBI interrogators and body language experts suggest that there are various telltale signs that women may observe that help solidify their suspicions.
Whether overtly or covertly confronting your husband, subconsciously he nervously exhibits certain signs that he is uncomfortable with the conversation. If he is normally calm, he will become visibly agitated. If he is usually upbeat, he will become abnormally calm. When you begin questioning him, your husband may clear his throat before making a sound. He might scratch his nose, comb his hair with his fingers or start breathing heavily. Other signs include turning his abdominal region away from you. He might look away or cover his eyes, his mouth or his entire face. He might squint in an attempt to block you out of his visual field. These are all symptoms that mentally, he wants to run.
He may dare to look you in the eyes while telling his lies. If his gaze turns into a spiteful stare, he is overcompensating. He might become overly affectionate or overly angry during the course of the conversation. Answering a question with a question gives him time to formulate excuses or what he perceives as a believable story.
Turning the Tables
Guilty people also often try turning the tables on their accuser. He might accuse you of bringing up past baggage, or claim that you have a vivid imagination. He might also suggest that you are just being insecure, listening to your trouble-making friends or watching too much TV. These are merely tactics of attempting to alleviate himself from the burden of guilt by shifting blame.
People who are talented liars often twist the truth to make you feel uncertain and to question your suspicions. He may deny previous conversations or situations while simultaneously adamantly claiming that these circumstances never occurred. He might try planting a guilt trip on you. He may play up his role as a victim. You horrible person, how could you possibly think that he could commit such an act? This is a method of manipulation known as gaslighting. Stay focused. Do not let him confuse your thoughts, and continue investigating the incident.
Listen closely to his original story. He may distance himself from the incident or provide so many details that he practically paints a picture with excuses. However, ask him to retell the story in a couple of days, and odds are the story changes. He will not remember all of the fabricated details. While making excuses for himself, he might also pause mid-sentence and trail off into a different direction. These are all indications that your intuition is on the right track.