How to Tell Someone How You Feel

The thought of telling someone how you feel commonly instills fear. The mind may conjour a variety of negative scenarios that include rejection and disappointment. You might finally build the courage to be honest and open only to clam up at the last moment. The union has no chance of venturing to the next level unless you express your true feelings. Take a moment and consider how you might have the conversation.

Control Your Thoughts

It is not uncommon for people to entertain possible future events in their brain. If you tell that person how you feel and they respond in the way that you had hoped, you begin envisioning what the future holds for you both. On the other hand, if things do not go as you planned, you focus on negative feelings and how your life might just never be the same. Stifle the urge to punish yourself this way, which only adds to the tension.

Examine Your Motives

Does having them in your life make you a better person? Do you genuinely care about them, or are you more entranced with what they may do for you? The motivation behind your feelings should revolve around loving that individual for who they are and having a desire to develop a relationship that offers mutual benefits.

The Right Opportunity

Choose a relaxed, private moment to open up to the other person. Do not let anxiety or your feelings bubble up to the point of boiling over and blurt out the sentiment in a moment of haste while you are in a crowd. Telling the other person via a text or a voice mail is also impersonal and inappropriate. But, do not put the conversation off waiting for the “perfect” time and deprive yourself of the chance.

Eliminate the Drama

Your heart feels like jumping out of your chest. Your palms sweat and there are butterflies in your stomach. You have allowed your body to itensify the pressure you feel. It is natural to feel slightly uncomfortable, because you are taking a risk of feeling foolish. Give yourself a break and relax. Regardless of how the other person responds to your expression, it will not be the end of the world. You will survive.

Dig Deep

In your day to day life, you undoubtedly face situations that require confidence and courage that often comes naturally. Think about who you are in those moments. Expressing yourself to another person should be no different. Be that person when you have the conversation.

Conversation Starters

Begin by telling that person you heard a song that reminded you of them. Perhaps there is an upcoming event that you would both enjoy attending. Perhaps revisit something that happened in the past that humored you both. By discussing a shared experience, you are less anxious to express your feelings.

How to Tell Someone How You Feel: ""
Cite this page: Nugent, Pam M.S., "How to Tell Someone How You Feel," in PsychologyDictionary.org, February 9, 2016, https://psychologydictionary.org/article/how-to-tell-someone-how-you-feel/ (accessed November 17, 2017).
SHARE